Stop apologizing for femaleness and/or femininity.

Feminist is not a four-letter word. We heard this emphatically from Dr. J on the first day of class, meaning that feminist/m is not something bad or something to be ashamed of. This recently came up in a conversation with my brother (the one with whom I consistently argue about feminism). He said something to the effect of feminists wanting women to be better than men. I quickly corrected him and asserted that feminists do not want any rights/privileges above those of men; we simply want equality.
This point is spoken very eloquently and sometimes humorously by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie in a TEDx presentation: Inspiring ideas about Africa. A couple of points from the video I wanted to comment on:

• "Gender as it functions today is a grave injustice." The sad part is that many men and women do not realize this. My brother would fall into this category. He refuses to recognize that inequalities exist today; and when he does recognize they exist, he says that just as African Americans did, women will eventually gain equal rights (justified apparently by the fact that African Americans gained rights before women, so we just have to wait our turn...). Brad, we are not in a post-civil rights world. African Americans are still fighting for rights. The law may say one thing, but culture often says another. Adichie also asserts that we should be angry about this because anger has a long history of bringing about positive change.
• Adichie asserts that we must raise our sons AND daughters differently than we do currently. Further, she posits that our cultural definition of masculinity is too narrow and as such is the source of further discrepancies between and oppression of women. We teach girls to be ashamed, to silence themselves and that "pretense is an art form."As a developing developmental psychologist, a lot of my studies thus far has focused on the development of children from a psychological perspective and parenting has been shown to have a huge impact on children; society also has a huge impact.
• "Men and women are different - biologically and hormonally. Socialization exaggerates the differences and they then become a self-fulfilling prophecy." The most common (and easiest) argument made by opponents of feminism is that men and women are different. Yes, I think we can all agree on that point. But others may fail to recognize the reasons why men and women are different: the social system which we are indoctrinated into has a huge effect on who we become.  A girl and boy have the same potential at birth; the way we raise them determines how they come to view themselves and what they believe they are capable of. When the world tells boys that they must be strong and successful and girls that they should subserve their goals and dreams to those of men, it is likely that exactly will happen.
• Adichie also recognizes the intersectionality of gender, class, and race. She discusses a black male friend of hers who just didn't understand how "as a black woman" was any different from being a black woman. Her final point in this video was that "culture does not make people; people make culture." Further, she asserts that we must change culture to address the oppression of women. 

Something I would add to Adichie's assertion that we should raise boys and girls differently is that we need to change the way that children view femininity and masculinity. Sexist ideals are rampant in children's literature (see: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nx8RRIiP53Q), so even in a welcome and open home environment children are influenced by the mass media, which tells them who they should be and how they should act. Are there any specific examples you can think of besides those raised by Colin Stokes? Any ways/ideas to change the culture in which we live?